Bright Future

If those of you who don't know, I've been struggling with health issues for the past while. My psychiatrist has been playing with several (many) medications that may or may not have been causing more adverse effects than good. So I've been struggling with knowing what to do about it. I've felt confused and even sick about it. So Andrea encouraged me to ask for a Priesthood blessing this weekend while the guys were up.
So yesterday I asked for a blessing from Dad, Kevin, and Will. It was a really wonderful thing.

It promised a bright future and that made me very hopeful. Hope is something that has eluded me for quite a while. I meet with my Psychiatrist this Thursday and I'm going to ask him about seriously cutting back on a lot (if not all) of my meds. It's kind of a scary prospect and I know it will be pretty hard, but I want to see if something else will work better, and the only way to know is to try.

So there is a brief update. Things are looking up. Down times will come, but sunny days are ahead.

Gratitude: I'm grateful...

For the Beauty of the Earth
*For my family
*For the love my family has for me
*For all the things my family has taught, teaches, and will teach me
*For the examples set for me by my family
*For compassion
*For second chances
*And third chances
*For forgiveness
*For kisses
*For hugs
*For fireplaces and soft rugs
*For cuddling in warm blankets
*For a nice warm bed
*For food
*For MUSIC
*The piano
*The cello
*My voice
*For all the choirs I have been in and will be in
*For learning
*For my fingers
*For safety
*For freedom
*For agency
*For the Ultimate Sacrifice
*For The Lord and Savior
*For Heavenly Father
*For the Holy Spirit
*For tender mercies
*When I'm having a bad day and I get in the car and one of my favorite pieces just happen to be on the radios
*For my future husband
*For all my past and present counselors
*For my friends
*For Lindsey and Anna
*For new opportunities
*For the new day
*For Life
*For LOVE


There are so many more. But I want to finish with the lyrics to a song I sang in a choir long ago:

Pilgrims' Hymn

Even before we call on Thy name
To ask Thee, dear Lord;
And we seek the words to glorify Thee
Thou hearest our prayer

Unceasing Love! Oh, Unceasing Love:
Surpassing all we know.
Glory to the Father and the Son
And to the Holy Spirit.

Even with darkness sealing us in
We breathe Thy name;
And through all the days that follow so fast
We trust in Thee

Endless Thy grace! Oh, Endless Thy grace:
Beyond all mortal dream.
Both now and forever and unto ages,
and ages. Amen


Happy Thanksgiving

Snow

Well, it finally snowed... It's true. I am actually amazed that we lasted so long without it! It was crazy how long it stayed dry. Well, there are some good things about snow: snowmen, snowball fights, there is something about being out in nature when it's covered in snow that is so peaceful, sledding, (skiing for those of you who do that), and my favorite, clear winter nights where the sky is so absolutely clear where the stars look so near that you can almost touch them. If it wasn't so durn cold, I could stay out there for hours just looking at the sky (oh and another great thing is one of my favorite constellations is out: Orion. I don't know why, but I've always liked him).

There are a lot of negatives associated with winter as well. BUT, I'm going to focus on the positives and hopefully I can make it through! I'll just remember that the Lord gave us winter so we can love summer. :) And trust me, after 5 months (sometimes 6) of the white stuff, we need lots of summer! Even if it means I have to say goodbye to my good friend Orion.

HURRAY!!!!!

Pi-tui! Pi-tui! (that is the sound of fireworks going off... Richard will know what I mean ;) It's done!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! My 10 Page Research Paper entitled "Weary of the Shadowy Self": The Quest for Virtue in George MacDonalds the Wise Woman and C. S. Lewis's The Great Divorce phew. Even saying the title wears me out... It was quite a lot of work and I am so grateful for everyone that helped me on it. Thanks to Lindsey for encouraging me and helping with my works cited page, thanks to Andrea for her encouragement (I could not have made it without your pep talks), and thanks to DAD for your revisions! I might actually get a good grade because of your coaching! and thanks most of all, to my Heavenly Father for His sustaining power and help. I definitely could not have done it without him. It was SOOOOO HARD!!! But I did it! YAY! I don't even care what grade I get... well, maybe just a little... :D But I'm DONE!!!! (Now all I have to worry about is the next paper... which rumor has it is supposed to be even longer... waaaaaaaaaaaaa....) But OKAY!

CELEBRATE GOOD TIMES COME ON! LA LA LA LA LA LA LA LA LA LA!!!!

New Poem

Well, I was walking on campus one day and a very attractive young man walked by me and I thought to myself: "why is it that I couldn't meet him and fall in love with him?" Just a silly passing thought. But it was the thought that followed that I held onto: "Paths cross, but never meet." And Voila! (not to be confused with a viola) Two lines for a new poem! Then I built around it and I came up with an okay poem. Well I like it a lot. So here goes.


Crossing Paths (working title)

The road I'm on
I did not choose
Of all I hold
It's dreams I lose
I see a face
Beyond the feet
Our paths cross
But never meet

Sitting still
I'm running hard
Once solid heart
Now broken shards
Pale face and
Empty breast
A weight upon
My beating chest

Looking down
And seeing black
The sound of feet
Run front and back
Will it end
This path of grey?
This path of damned,
Gone yesterdays?

Once I sang
For only you
Now I sing
To make it through
But though I sing
You still stay
Just one path
One path away


I know it's kind of a dark poem, but let me know what you think. I welcome feedback (preferably in the form of constructive criticism :) Love You!

Elisabeth/Buzz/Betty, etc.